Self-Reliance

Self-reliance is a skill. It could also be considered a mind-set. As a skill that can be understood and learned, I think it goes hand in hand with having the right mentality to make it happen. But where do you start?

If you face a problem, you may feel out of control. You don't know whether to take action or stick your head in the sand, run and hide or face up to whatever it is. It can feel quite fearful on a number of levels.

People may want to boost their ability to take control and improve their lot. Whether that be at the end of a relationship where the other person made most decisions or took control of problems, & it feels daunting to find a way forward. Or perhaps at work, where doubts about abilities and confidence can surface. Or those not allowed to be their own person from a very young age and wanting to develop their confidence and self-reliance. 

You can start by giving yourself permission to be self-reliant (it does not mean being selfish, that's something different) You could start right now, say, 'I am self-reliant'. Check what that is like as you say it. Do you feel stronger? When you do something slightly out of your comfort zone, eg, suggesting to a co-worker you do a particular task that perhaps they usually seem to 'take over'. Afterwards, reward yourself with something positive. You overcame fear. The more you rely on you, the happier you will be.  

It is possible to find and get your self-reliance reward. I nearly wrote 'award' then! Actually, it could be like giving yourself an award, a 'recognition' of a skill, if you like. That's a rewarding idea.     

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About the Author: Angie works as a hypnotherapist, counsellor and coach at the Norfolk Clinic Complementary Healthcare Clinic, 38-40 Magdalen Road, Norwich.  

Call Norfolk Clinic reception on 01603 660792 or Angie directly on 07773 610816.  She loves helping other people achieve their potential in life and work and to find greater happiness using a range of therapeutic techniques.